It starts on the
path of mediocrity, takes you down the valley of stupidity, makes you think
there’s more to this disjointed story, and then fools you into believing the
cast is more than it seems. Just when you think you’ve had enough, it drops you
down the hole of impossibility and leaves you with one question:
“Could this
movie be any worse?”
Sadly, it was.
Here’s a sorry excuse for a movie based on Hasbro’s toy series G.I. Joe. I
actually felt the first G.I. Joe movie, The Rise of Cobra, was
overrated, but after seeing this one, I think the first should have been given
more respect than it got. The acting was crappy, the disjointed stories felt
like they’d never meet, and when they finally did, I ended up wishing they
hadn’t.
Bruce Willis is
in this movie for a reason I don’t quite understand, and then Dwayne Johnson is
also added—all of which feels like a cheap attempt to boost sales. Don’t let
the posters fool you; Bruce Willis had little to nothing to do in this film.
Some of the old
cast members from the first movie were called back, including Channing Tatum,
Arnold Vosloo, Ray Park, Jonathan Pryce, and Lee Byung-hun, all reprising their
roles from the first film.
The brief
summary of the plot has our Joes up against their old enemy Cobra, but this
time, he seems to be smarter. Cobra found a way (while imprisoned) to
infiltrate the United States presidency by having the president kidnapped and
replacing him with Zartan. Now, Zartan is the new president of the United
States, and he orders an air strike to kill off the Joes. After major
casualties, only Roadblock (Dwayne Johnson), Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki), and
Flint (D.J. Cotrona) survive, and they decide to get their revenge.
Meanwhile, the
Arashikage clan sends Snake Eyes (Ray Park) to capture the renegade Storm
Shadow (Lee Byung-hun) to answer for the death of his uncle.
Somehow, these
two stories intertwine, and at the end, the good guys win—nothing special about
that.
This movie is
just full of fast-paced action scenes that don’t leave behind enough juice for
you to value them (there’s no lasting impression).
If you have enough spare time on your hands, I advise you to catch up on some sleep and forget about seeing this movie, it has nothing to offer.
I dont like this review. The complaints made against the film don't hold any water. Since when was G.I. Joe about the story? It's like complaining that Transformers is crappy because the story and acting is not good. Seriously?
ReplyDeleteHow?...
ReplyDeleteIf there is no story, then all we have is just action scenes happening for no reason, a good story is what makes the movie standout memorable.
And comparing this to Transformers, Haba! The Transformers had a better storyline than this. Sorry but i'm a fan of good acting and good story not just pointless and disjointed action scenes
Kai!!! This is too harsh my broda!
ReplyDeleteI think its a good watch and its only gonna get bera...
Deji
oh my God, i hope you are wrong and they will not make a part 3
ReplyDelete