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Dark Tide (2012)

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Dark Tide (2012)


Halle Berry
Olivier Martinez
Ralph Brown

Directed by: John Stockwell

Does Dark Tide qualify as movie to see?

The answer to that is a sad 'NO!' as this movie lacks in all that can make it worth your sit down time to view it. The problem is just that after you are have been drowned in the dialogues and then tossed around by some guy who thinks risk is fun, the movie pretty much has nothing more to offer, making you the view leave the cinema hall, indifferent and pretty sure you just saw a documentary like movie.

Released on limited screens, I will say only watch this when you get to the cinema and the other entire movie halls are full. This tragic thriller follows a tale of Kate Mathieson (Halle Berry), who was a renowned documentary host for swimming with Great White Sharks.

After a tragic death of her mentor, she hung up her swimming suit and spent her days giving mundane wildlife tours to anyone who pays. Her old partner Jeff (Olivier Martinez) shows up later, after being paid by an adventure seeking father and son to convince her to take them to swim with the sharks.

Now I’m not the one to call a movie script dumb (well that may not be totally true) but this script feels so weak and lame that I was wondering why any of the producers thought they have a A+ script.

Dark Tide is directed by John Stockwell, who also directed the waste of film reel Into the Blue in 2005, which starred Jessica Alba and Paul Walker.

Production of Dark Tide was done in South Africa, and shot for six weeks on a small boat with real Great White Sharks. The underwater camera work was impressive that I must add, and the film had really nice continuity as the underwater scenes don’t seem to far from what is actually happening.

The plot though was too thin to run a movie on and the Characters too brief, not too much going on in their resume to grow an attachment to.

Halle Berry hasn’t acted in any form of block buster since X – Men Last Stand in 2006, every other movie since then has been on Limited release and they have just been a pass by, just like this one is, a pass by one which you should just walk away from.

But if you have seen this movie, I will like to know what you made of it.

21 Jump Street (2012)

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21 Jump Street


Jonah Hill
Channing Tatum
Brie Larson
Rob Riggle
Ice Cube

Directed by Phil Lord and Chris Miller

Distributed by: Columbia Pictures

I have to be honest, I never expected to like this movie, but boy was it good, the whole idea of adults going undercover as kids was actually a fun ride and I enjoyed it more than I planned to.

Buddy cop movies have been losing their waves. The thing is that all the buddy cop movies after Rush Hour 1 (1998) or Lethal Weapon (1987 – 1998), the buddy cop movies done now have been either too dull to comprehend or just mildly interesting and could just pass as a movie you’ve seen just to mark the register that you’ve seen it.

Based on a TV series of the same name which aired on Fox Network between 1987 and 1991, the series focuses on a squad of youthful-looking undercover police officers investigating crimes in high schools, colleges, and other teenage venues. The 2012 movie adaptation also had the former cast of the series; Johnny Depp and Peter DeLuise play a minor role.

The plot had the duo Hill and Tatum as Morton Schmidt and Greg Jenko (respectively), get deployed as undercover cops to a high school to bust a drug ring, and everything you’d expect to happen, doesn’t. That’s the fun of the movie.

Written by Jonah Hill who also starred in it, 21 Jump Street is a movie that suits a cinema viewing with a box of popcorn at your side. Hill’s performance was on a mild okay side, but the main cheese in the movie was Channing Tatum, who transcended from a jock to a nerd and still maintained his persona. I guess the most fun I had was when I saw Ice – Cube talking to the duo.

The movie was directed by Phil Lord and Chris Miller (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs). The directors and writers made sure you didn’t have to go see the original to get the full taste of 21 Jump Street, as the film made do of the current pop culture in our time and how ironic and dumb it looks to make a fun movie and enough juice left to make another.

21 Jump Street makes fun of everything in its path, even down to drugs, and how we kept expecting things to blow up and they just don’t. The jokes keeps coming in from every corner making you laugh all through.

The high moments in the movie was whenever the duo were together, the low moment was when they were apart.

It is a good movie to see, so go see it.

Mirror Mirror (2012)

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Mirror Mirror (2012)



Julia Roberts
Lily Collins
Armie Hammer
Sean Bean

Directed by Tarsem Singh

Distributed by Relativity Media

Mirror Mirror, takes a while getting into, but after you get over the first 40 mins the movie isn’t that bad, it is cool wonderful and I did enjoy the twist of things when it came to a story we are all used to, the story of Snow White.

The comedy did hit home and I rather found the movie more funny than intriguing, I enjoyed all the additions of comic relief here and there. This comedy fantasy film and it is based on the fairy tale "Snow White" by the Brothers Grimm and the movie is directed by Tarsem Singh who also directed The Cell (2000) and Immortals (2011).

The plot is the same is based on ’Snow White’ by the Brothers Grimm and stars Lily Collins (Phil Collins daughter and also starred in Abduction) as snow White and Julia Roberts as the evil queen.

Mirror Mirror is a shy away from great, but the screenplay was well carved, yes you are watching Snow White and the Seven dwarves (1937), but it felt different. I guess the main reason it was fun to watch was the difference in the way things played out. The movie derived its name from the words that the Wicked Queen uses to address her Magic Mirror, a phrase we are all used to "Mirror mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?".

Snow was supposed to be saved by the prince, but in this Jason Keller (Machine Gun Preacher) tale the prince was the one needing saving.

I was so impressed by the screen write by Jason Keller that I spent majority of time being captivated by the turn of events, than the events itself. Mirror Mirror to me was good because of the screenplay and script rather than the directing. Not saying directing isn’t important but you have to see this movie for yourself to understand.

It’s been long since I have seen anything done by Julia Roberts, but this wasn’t a disappointment and her acting showed why she is and will always remain one of the best things that happened to the silver screen. Mirror Mirror wasn’t more of a financial success and it was also not well received holding only a 50% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. But regardless of all that the film received an Academy Award nomination for Best Costume Design.

I liked this movie and I stand to say all should go see it for themselves.

Project X (2012)

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Project X (2012)


Thomas Mann
Oliver Cooper
Jonathan Daniel Brown
Kirby Bliss Blanton
Alexis Knapp

Directed by: Nima Nourizadeh

Distributed by: Warner Bros.

Project X, is a Project F.

From the stables of the man that brought us HangoverTodd Phillips, comes this disgrace of a movie, which is meant to be a found footage kind of thing, but the film just has a pack of fools, running around with nothing but orgy on their mind.

The question that runs through my mind is, “who packs, lame excuses, blunt minded, hooligan thinking, dumb looking, stupid sounding, stooges together and thinks a movie is about to be made?”
Well the producers did, and they were so pumped about the idea that they may be a sequel.
Some people actually enjoyed this movie which is a surprise to me for I can’t seem to understand how anybody will watch this movie and like it.

Project X has the simplest plot ever, 3 guys decide to throw a party so as to get laid, and as usual things got out of hand. That’s all folks. Every other thing in the movie came about from using cliché scenes, music video style acting and lame dialogues to fill up time.

The editing was whack and out of bounce, continuity was lacking a master’s touch.
Directing could have been done by a toddler because I was wondering while watching may be the director must have fallen asleep on his head.

Directed by Nima Nourizadeh an advertisement director, who gave some of the casts iPhones and Blackberry devices to capture some of the scenes used in the movie itself, which were then used in the final movie production; editing was then done in the merger of both of the camera shots and the phone clips. The movie was shot in 25 nights and sorry to say it is a commercial success.
The movie holds a 27% approval rating on the review aggregate site Rotten Tomatoes, the movie was done based on a $12 million budget and it went to make over a 100 million, and made a good sale in DVDs.

My final take is, don’t watch this, it contains nudity and there is cursing all around, and not even a plan to entertain you, unless if such is all that you find entertaining and a good plot is not even on your mind.

Project X has a lot missing, some of it is common sense, and the funny part is that Warner Bros ordered a sequel so very soon in the near future we should be expecting Project X 2.

Dr Seuss' The Lorax (2012)

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Dr Seuss' The Lorax (2012)


Starring (Voice)
Danny DeVito
Zac Efron
Taylor Swift
Ed Helms
Rob Riggle

Directed by Chris Renaud and Kyle Balda

Distributed by Universal Pictures

The film is the fourth feature film based on a book by Dr. Seuss, the second Dr. Seuss adaptation fully computer-animated after Horton Hears a Who!, and the first released in 3-D and probably not one of the best adaptations. The distribution company Universal Pictures released the film on March 2nd 2012, the 108th birthday of Seuss.

The movie made a mess of what Disney/Pixardid with WALL-E (2008), as WALL-E passed the message of our environment depleting, with the aid of a love story, and what i believed could not be possible; robots with no words making a classic must see movie, the movie was like a silent film animation, and it was regarded as one of the best.

The Lorax too tries to achieve such (showing a depleting earth with a love story), on the same platform, but it was too watered down to be noticed, the voice casting was well done. The movie follows the laid down plot of the book about a 12 year old boy search for the one thing that will enable him to win the affection of the girl of his dreams. On his quest towards finding that one thing he found himself stumbling on the story of the Lorax.
The Lorax is a grumpy orange like creature whose main task is to protect the earth (when i say earth i mean the forest and woods) from destruction.

The studio responsible for this is Illumination Entertainment, which brought you the much acclaimed Despicable Me and directed by Chris Renaud (Despicable Me).

The Lorax is a colourful movie with singing and dancing all well enough for a kid to enjoy. So if you want a movie for your kids, go see this.

But you have to give kudos to Danny DeVito, to me the only thing I enjoyed most about the movie was hearing him speak, he brought life into a movie that seem to be missing out on all things good.
The Lorax was received with mixed reviews, 55% of critics in Rotten Tomatoes gave it a positive reviews, and the movie is also a commercial success. The movie is produced with a $70 million budget and it went on to make over $340 million in the box office.

This movie is neither great nor grand, Dr. Seuss: The Lorax is a movie that will not make you plan a second visit to the cinema. The Lorax just drags and the movie to me is one that only a matured mind will be able to understand. So for me to say this is a movie you will not mind skipping, know that I mean it.