Once in a while,
I like watching comedies universally panned by critics because they can be so
bad that they become really funny. You watch the movie thinking, “It can’t be
that bad,” and then they surprise you.
The thought I had when the credits started rolling was, “They knew.”
They knew this
movie was crap right from the beginning. They knew they didn’t have anything,
and all they had was people like me who liked the first movie and would love to
see a second part—and they cashed in on that.
In this crap
pot, which Kevin James co-wrote, Paul and his daughter go to a security
officer’s convention in Las Vegas. It just so happens that the hotel they’re
staying in—the Wynn Hotel—is also the location of a crime operation.
In the midst of
the convention, criminal mastermind Vincent (Neal McDonough) and his
accomplices disguise themselves as hotel employees to position themselves
perfectly as they steal priceless works of art from the hotel and replace them
with replicas.
Things were
going great for both Paul and Vincent—somehow, in the middle of the movie—until
their paths crossed, and Paul passed out from low blood sugar.
They would be
stupid to make a part 3. This was a financial ploy, taking advantage of the
audience. Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is another Happy Madison genre of
bad writing, weak characters, and a sad excuse for comic entertainment. Yep,
the movie is that bad and more, as it tries to string together shameful jokes
and totally avoidable stupidity with the aim of making you laugh hard.
In the end, you
do laugh—not at the movie, but at yourself for wasting your time and money to
go see it. The script lacked any form of seriousness to be accepted as a
well-thought-through idea.
The whole Mall
Cop thing in the first movie, where Paul tries to deter some bad guys
alone, was good. That does not give Happy Madison the right to ruin a good
memory. I had to look up the director (Andy Fickman) on Wiki because the movie
experience felt like he had never directed a movie before in his life—yet he’s
been in the business since 2002.
The movie was a
commercial success. Why? Because people like me wanted to watch Paul Blart
again.
Happy Madison Productions, an Adam Sandler company, is making money from mediocrity. I can’t wait for that to stop.
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