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The Three Musketeers (1993)


The Three Musketeers (1993)


3/10


Starring
Charlie Sheen
Kiefer Sutherland
Chris O'Donnell
Oliver Platt
Tim Curry


Directed by Stephen Herek


The movie seems to be more interested in clean costumes than in entertaining. It also has needless horse chases that fail to excite. We have men wearing hats like they have a point to prove, and the only actor who seemed to take this movie seriously was Kiefer Sutherland. Even Tim Curry, whom I love, failed to deliver a performance worth recognizing.

Then there was the cinematography, which had many shots from ground-level angles. I kept wondering, "What was that all about? Whose idea was that? And why the hell did it make it past the editing floor?" Probably someone noticed, because I think it stopped during the last thirty minutes—no unnecessary ground-level shots were done after that.

When it came to the story and the way the director handled it, I was surprised I didn’t fall off my chair from dozing off. The story and plot were extremely boring—no taste at all—and the directing was poor. Director Stephen Herek has actually done some very interesting movies before this, which I’ve seen and liked. Two of those movies are Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (1989) and Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead (1991), so how he went from those two to this can only be best described as “everyone has their off days.”

The story starts with d’Artagnan (Chris O’Donnell) defending himself from a man who claims he slept with his sister. D’Artagnan wins the sword fight and is forced to run when the man’s brothers give chase. He escapes and heads to Paris to pursue his dream of being a Musketeer.

In Paris, the Cardinal is plotting to rule as king, even though the young king is already unable to do much, and the Cardinal already has control. To make his control and plans easier, he disbands the Musketeers.

All the Musketeers leave except for three—Athos (Sutherland), Porthos (Oliver Platt), and Aramis (Charlie Sheen). Without giving away spoilers, d’Artagnan finds himself having to face them, but that’s interrupted when the Cardinal’s guards arrive to arrest them. The four fight together, and d’Artagnan earns their respect when they defeat the men who came to arrest them. Soon, they learn of a plot to betray the king, and they now have to band together and save him.

The sword fights were not as impressive as I’d hoped, and this movie is easily forgettable. I only recall seeing it once in the 90s when I was younger, and before now, I could hardly remember what happened in the movie.

Don’t bother seeing this movie again if you’ve already seen it in the past. It’s not worth the eyesore.

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